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Post by Oceans Seven on Nov 28, 2012 22:30:03 GMT
In other news i managed to catch "Ocean's 7" team manager Ashlee Cole after a team practice session yesterday and asked him for a comment on the new player "W Tuvrobt" that he's bought.
So Ash this new player you've bought for what was it 10100 creds, Christ its an awfull lot like and im shure the punters would like to know why??
"Hi Murphy shure, well he's a good ladd ive been watching him play some friendly game's over the last eight or so months and i must say he plays with a lot of passion really love's the sport. When he see's somthing he want's he just go's right after it and as ive said ive watched him in a few game's now he's strong in the center but also not to shabby flying down the left wing he's got the speed he's got the stamina BUT the power he puts in to his shot's are just unbelievable and i really think given the chance that he could do very well for his self and the club and make a good career of this by going pro.
He's a good kid worked hard this season and i think he deserves to go far and given the right coaching i think he could do just that."
Aye right enough, well there you gooo sport's punters that's just one of the few eye opener's fer starter's to watch allready this season AND when Ash puts him in his first game im shure there will be a lot of eye's on the ladd, thank's Ash,
"Shure Murph anytime"
This is Murphy O'Donnell for Sport's Round Up signing off Christ, back to you in the studio Chris!
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Post by Admin on Nov 29, 2012 9:08:57 GMT
Tuvrobt............Ash, you will have to keep that name now, right? Just give him a first name.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 18, 2013 8:25:17 GMT
Suprise newsA shock Win :ofor the Destroyers against the Scorpions in a titanic battle. The team manager was aproached for his thought on the game but was unavailable for a interview. One of Griffins coaches told us they have had to order in a bucket load of extra smelling salts to try help bring the manager around as he had passed out from shock after the game. The coach informed us as well of the new kit comming out soon and name change of the team that must of inspired the players to greater heights, Hopefully with this win the managers plan to line the players up against the goal line and shoot them all might be put on hold, but only time will tell
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Post by Admin on Jan 18, 2013 9:21:46 GMT
With how inaccurate people are at shooting around your club, they would have missed anyway.......................
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Post by Oceans Seven on Jul 23, 2013 18:17:16 GMT
In news's today Oceans 7 were in a wee spot O' trouble after there main sponsor "Carlsberg" terminated there contract after one season.
Quick as a flash i managed to get a few comments on the phone from Oceans 7 Manager Ashlee Cole, here's what he said.........
"Hello Murph, Yes i can confirm Ocean's and our sponsor's ""Carlsberg" have parted company on account of a tiny little thing being WE as a team did not live up to there standards concerning Carlsberg's slogan!""
What d'yah mean Ash please explain
"Well Carlsbergs slogan is and quote ""Carlsberg don't make fastball teams but if they did........" and well as we finished in 5th place on the league table last season they decided we were not the team to carry the Carlsberg name for them or some garbage like that!. But not to worry because I'm never one to be laid low for long, i made some phone calls and ""Guinness" have agreed kindly to help us out also with the slogan ""All good things come to those who........" So yes great im happy with that Murph"".
OKKAYY Thanks fer that Ash and all the best to ye and yer team this season.
Christ...back to you now Chris in the studio
Murphy O'Donnell fer Sports Round Up signing off
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Post by Oceans Seven on Sept 28, 2013 19:18:30 GMT
Good evening ladys and gentle persons, Murphy O'Donnell here with another one of me rivitin reportsOk right lets see the other day i was only thinking to meself "CHRIST" its bin a wee bit quiet in the Oceans camp of late. Ye know not too much happinin, not many players to-in and fro-in from one team to another and all that NONSENCE, game scores a bit on the weak side etc etc so me bein a good inquisitive reporter with a nose fer a story decided it was time to pop over to Oceans 7 Tower stadium and have a general bit of a snoop round the changing rooms! O UMMMM JUST TO SEE WOT WAS GOIN ON Well apparentley the inside word is Ocean's 7 were due to riecieve a new STRIKER from Chilie this Thursday (26th September 2013) just gone, SO quick as a flash i popped down to Oceans 7 Managers Office Ashlee Cole fer a quick interview, aye he's good like that always got time fer people ye know! Murphy = Knocks door Ash = "come in " Murphy = "Ooo HI ASH just wondered if i could get a few words fer the ""Sports Round Up? "" Ash = "Ummmm not right now Murph kinda busy........lots to do....." Murphy = "Yerself's on camera!" Ash = "O right, yep no problem Murph cant be to long though" Murphy = "Aye s'fine, i heard that Oceans is expectin or was expectin a new striker from Chilie last Thursday then Ash?" Ash = "O you heard about that already? Weellll....." Murphy = "Whats his name?" Ash = "Ahh Javi Tronseco!" Murphy = "O THATS beeeeeeps# fastball clubs star striker isnt it?" Ash = "yes" Murphy = "OK soooo where is he, wot happened? O i know ""It was Immagration laws i bet cause ye had a problem with that when you signed up Pancorbo dint ye, by the way hes doing very well over at Neverwinter Wanderers"" Ash = "Nope not immagration laws Murph" Murphy = " Wot, E missed the plane then?" Ash = "nope " Murphy = "Ahhh calender mix up then beeeeeeps fastball club thought it was this week? cause thats been known to happen? " Ash = "Tronseco will be here this coming Thursday yes noow i really must go and..." Murphy = "NO NO ANG ON im all feckin confused NOW IF HE DINT MISS THE PLANE AND ITS NUTTHIN TO DO WITH IMMAGRATION AND THERE WERNT A CALENDER COCK UP.....wot was it? Did HE just forget. Is he a bit dim got the wrong day? " Ash = "Nope" Murphy = "WELL WOT" Ash = Quietly "i aaah forgot to send the cheque or wire the money " Silence....................................................! Murphy = "o you ever watch the TV program ""Only fools and Horses?"" Ash = " yep" Murphy = "you PRAAT!"
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Post by Oceans Seven on Aug 28, 2014 19:47:36 GMT
Welcome Fastball fans "Murphey O'Donnel" here for Sports Round-up. Im here at "Oceans7 Wave Crest Stadium" today with Oceans7 Captain, Kata Date and Right Runner Tokihiro Noro!. "LADS TELL ME AND THE FANS ABOUT TODAYS HARROWING DEFEAT YOU HAD WITH NEVERWINTER WANDERERS EARLER TODAY 13-22 WHAT DO YOU THINK WENT WRONG?" Arigato Murphy san, yes today not good day for Oceans7 team velly bad day, much honor lost today. KATA think Tonashi san drop ball at most important point of game!. Errrm right ok i thought he did ok today he got more goals then any other Oceans player today six in fact and got a tackel......... Sooooo plans for the week KATA, TOK? "O'DONNEL SAN DONT CALL ME "TOK"" ERRRR sorry, so umm hey what do you think of your new team kit - LYCRA? SKIN TIGHT? you all look like a bunch of "G.I.JOES" out there on the pitch lol. "we dont know this G.I.JOES what is this please? team kit also not new"! Right haa so plans for this week TOKKI? "WE CATCH PLANE NOW WHOLE TEAM SQUAD NOT RESERVES THOUGH" catch a plane to where TOKKI? "DONT CALL ME TOKKI we go to TIBET for high altitude training this is very good. Help with fitness. we go jog up and down Everest, BIG STAMINA INCREASE YES?" sweet jayzus ya think you will make it back in time for next weeks game? Oceans V Crimson Star at Home?? then the week after Oceans are away to the mighty Black Sunshine and there looking a bit tasty of late ehh Nokki ..........."NOKKI".........SSSSSHMACK!!!.................................................................... h hi HI im Rob the cameraman WOW DUDES THAT NORO DUDE JUST TOTALY COLD STUN DRAGONBALL ZZZEEED MR O'DONNEL.....COOOLL uummm over and out, bye now............were all fine....here..thanks.......................................!
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Post by Neverwinter on Aug 29, 2014 14:47:54 GMT
Neverwinter spokesman Albert Winslots had this to say:
Knocked Ovvverrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ta
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Post by Oceans Seven on Aug 29, 2014 19:17:21 GMT
Well hello again sportsfans. Today ive a bit of a treat for you all as im reporting to you LIVE from Napal at MT Everests Base Camp, which is actually THE 5TH FURTHEST POINT FROM THE CENTRE OF THE EARTH!. Yes.......well......Everest is anyway i dont mean the base camp, if you were watching yesterday you may recall Oceans7 got absolutely wasted in this weeks game to Neverwinter/Wanderers lol yes if i know Oceans gaffer he will be grinding his teeth on that one for some time, so because of that bad game result AND if you remember Oceans lost there game to Riverwood Raiders by 1 goal the week before, so Gaffer Cole has decided to send the whole first squad to Napal and MT EVEREST for some high altitude training. i understand the thin air at high altitude is supposed to aid stamina and fitness id like to see Tokihiro bloody Noro doing this......O wait here comes one o the guys now AHHH HAA ITS YOUNG NAILS BAKER. NAILS.....NAILS ANY CHANCE OF A QUICK FEW WORDS......................... "ahhhhhh fer $%** sake, YES MURPH NO PROBLEM" NAILS HOW YA DOING YOU LOOK OUT OF BREATH THERE MAN whats the coach got you and the guys doing today? "YEAH you would be too Murph if you had to JOG UP AND DOWN EVEREST ALL BLOODY DAY LONG IN A PAIR OF KHKAI SHORTS AND A WHITE T SHIRT, (mumble,mumble,grumble)" shurely your not going all the way to the top though thats just dangerous.....in fact if any wee kids are watching dont try this at home these are profeshniol athletes doing this "No Murph were ONLY jogging up to the NUPTSE PIEST WHICH is 25,771 ft OR 7,855 Meters above sea level NO NO NO ITS LIKE 29,029FT TO THE TOP, Coach says we might pass out as the air is really thin at that altitude" O i see well we wouldnt want that now would we lol you might DIE! "By the way me and some of the guys shure we saw a little naked guy running about over on the south peak......Looked a bit like the "RAVENS GAFFER, couldnt be shure though distance was a bit to far to see clearly"" AHHH YOUR PROBLEY HALLUCINATING LADD,.................. AT THAT HEIGHT YA KNOW..............LACK OF OXYGEN AND ALL THAT
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Post by Oceans Seven on Aug 30, 2014 18:18:20 GMT
Welcome Sportsfans to me Murphey O'Donnel for another Sports-Round-UP. Its 18:30hrs ZULU Time ITS EVEREST,..........ITS BASE CAMP,.............ITS DAY TWOOOO With me now is Oceans TROY KING, "TROY" KIN I CALL YOU "TROY" "yes sir" Dang you is a big Mutha, WOT you must be......6.4" 6.5"? "6.6"" wot 255-265ib? "265ib" DAAAANNG SON, you work out? anyway where's the team right now? "Thayy is up oon the piiste SOMEWAYYAH tween Baase caamp aand the sath-eaast riidge" Thats some American accent ya got there wow your like "SHAFT" "ARE YOU TALKING TO ME FOOOOL, LISTEN JUST BECAUSE IAA LOOK AFTA MASELF AND SOOO HAPPENS I LIKE TO WORK OUT ABIT, THAT JUST BECAUSE YOOW ASS IS SOME HOT SHOT SPORTS PERSONALITY YOOW THINK YOOW KIN INSULT ME. KUZ I WILLL KNOCK YOOW ASS THE F$%K OUT BOOY!" DID you just go all Samuel L Jackson on me??? WAIT.....Whats that rumbling noise............OH MY GODDD UP THERE... ITS AN AVALANCHE! OCEANS7 IS RIGHT IN ITS PATH...DAAAN DAAAN DAAAAAAAANNNN HAYELP HAYELP, TROY DO SOMTHING TROY(this one's for you Carrie)"SOB" THEY ALL GONNA DIE TROY! "MAN WOT??? DO AHH LOOK LIKE A SUPERHERO TO YOU? mann and you scream like a girl....." WHEWW tune in next time sports fans when will find out if OCEANS7 GO DOWN IN HISTORY AS THE FIRST FASTBALL TEAM TO CLIMB EVEREST?? DOES TROY KING WHEAR HIS UNDERPANTS ON TOP.....HISSSS..........PANTS WHO THE HELL IS TROY KING ANYWAY?? Late score results just in = Colson Athletic 25-39 Amorak Rangers......Rogue Hornets V Disney Warriors LATE KICK OFF....................
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Post by Admin on Aug 31, 2014 17:06:41 GMT
Just to add to the mystery, it appears that the team are not actually on Everest, as initially reported, but actually up on the Mendips somewhere.............
Weird stuff going on at Oceans Seven, must that strange hypnotic brew that the manager of Raven is giving you............
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Post by Raven on Aug 31, 2014 18:16:55 GMT
How did you get that secret information!?
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Post by Admin on Sept 1, 2014 15:43:03 GMT
How did you get that secret information!? Luca Mosbauer is strangely forthcoming when having a couple of steins of lager inside him.
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Post by Oceans Seven on Sept 2, 2014 23:14:55 GMT
Yeah odley enough I found that...........
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Post by Oceans Seven on Sept 3, 2014 13:22:56 GMT
LOL NO NO no noo im shure your confusing us with Finsbury Cross or somthing like that ha ha, the Mendips just arnt high altitude enough for ma ladds. Such perfessshniol athletes deserve a high standard of training of coarse as im shure your aware of lol. i MEAN to say that the team are up on the Mendips right now is just slanderous , unethical , preposterous , obsurd , perpendicular and contrary to what we here at Oceans are trying to achieve for the future benefit of the club, AHmen . Also i sought advice from our legal lot,.............................which......is..... Mr Baxter down at Citizens advice. An he said to tell you that you got two choices buster........Cake.....or Death!!!!!
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