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Post by Oceans Seven on May 19, 2016 7:35:50 GMT
Think I just got time to slip this in before kick off for the friendly's today.... Morning Fastball fan's welcome to the start of another season. Season 5 ehhhh, EHHHH and were still here.
Here's One, Two goldfish in a tank, One say's to the other "How do we drive this then?" (puke)yeah ok it was crap!
SOOOO on and upward. Well tension's were high yesterday morning at the Ocean's ground at the practice session after Chadwick was practicing penalty's. All that rain we've had of late seem's to have uncovered a 500lb WW11 bomb (honest you couldn't script write this).
Well Chadwick fell over it broke his thumb so now he's on the bench for the first game, I said mate just shoot for the enemy's.... I mean opposition's goal net you don't have to shoot for the moon. So that put paid to practice whilst the bomb squad were called....
Turn's out they couldn't defuse it so they detonated the sodding thing right there and then just like that, we ended up with a 60ft wide by 30ft deep crater in the penalty box area.
This in turn took out "Aunt Betty's ice cream shack" (its a small business concern to one side of the goal area) well it was. Also some bloody talent scout was injured in the process!. I must have a word with security,
I understand he worked for "Raven" go's by the name of "Eli Greenwood" Yoshinaka caught his ID tag bless him. I rang "Jay Raven's gaffer" he said to "just put what's left of him in a box and FED-EX him back over to us we'll rebuild him make him better, stronger and faster than he was before!" I said what's that cost? he said "about 6 million quid" I said NO FOR THE POSTAGE!!!! apparently they did the same with Mosbauer....? I dunno I just thought Mosbauer (no relation to Jack) drank a lot of Lucozade.
So tomorrow's friendly with Phoenix firebirds will be at THERE ground, Which suits us we always seem to play better away anyway. Reason for that is some Ju Ju African witch doctor was doing some good luck mojo on the team back at the beginning of season 1 and it backfired Go figure.
Well, think that should do it fer now anyway, swing low swing high sweet chariot or which ever way you swing keep it to your self O that reminds me. Jaime Wolf stay the HELL away from my lad's changing room's this season, Lucas Bolt is 4 month's pregnant had to let him go, always thought there was summet odd with that boy!
Don't forget to cheer for us this season, if your new to this fastball lark you'll catch on quick enough were the one's playing in Blue and Red. Were not quite the best but were entertaining
Right that's definitely it now before this become's a book sod off you lot.
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Post by Raven on May 21, 2016 18:03:51 GMT
We seem to be missing a leg
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Post by Raven on May 21, 2016 18:05:33 GMT
And of course, if Mosbauer were to drink an energy drink it would be Relentless. Thank you sponser
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Post by Oceans Seven on May 27, 2016 13:43:33 GMT
We seem to be missing a leg......? Hhhhmmm sorry Jay us ear at Oceans are speechless, never one to back down in the face of a challenge we asked our fans for some help........ Mrs Badcrumble of no 73 Hullavington Terrace, had this to say.... "Well its all quite, quite simple really you see I heard this BIG Bang and came up with this theory, or analytical thesis if you like, if you think of it as a solution rather than a problem then the problem in all it's entirety becomes the solution......Thus. The Schrödinger equation acts on the entire probability amplitude, not merely its absolute value. Whereas the absolute value of the probability amplitude encodes information about probabilities, its phase encodes information about the interference between quantum states. This gives rise to the "wave-like" behavior of quantum states. As it turns out, analytic solutions of the Schrödinger equation are available for only a very small number of relatively simple model Hamiltonians, of which the quantum harmonic oscillator, the particle in a box, the dihydrogen cation, and the hydrogen atom are the most important representatives. Even the helium atom—which contains just one more electron than does the hydrogen atom—has defied all attempts at a fully analytic treatment. There exist several techniques for generating approximate solutions, however. In the important method known as perturbation theory, one uses the analytic result for a simple quantum mechanical model to generate a result for a more complicated model that is related to the simpler model by (for one example) the addition of a weak potential energy". Did you get that? Ergo basically your leg got lost in transit I suggest you speak to Fed-Ex mate!
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Post by Phoenix Firebirds on May 27, 2016 13:46:54 GMT
Priceless.
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Post by Oceans Seven on May 27, 2016 14:13:44 GMT
Yeah, don't get me started on the Energy drink
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Post by Raven on May 29, 2016 20:47:50 GMT
We don't see what a lost leg and energy drink has to do with a possibly dead cat in a box. However, when Schrödinger died, he was buried in a coffin....... so he is neither alive nor dead
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Post by Oceans Seven on Jun 1, 2016 10:13:41 GMT
Morning you lot right ear goes.....NEW THREAD......... First to business. This coming Friday we say a sad fond farewell to Rosemary our telephone operator who's been with us since the early day's and Oceans7 started first playing at Yate Sport's Centre....... Carpark!!!.... And my office was a Beige "Y reg" Fiat Panda and the nearest phonebox. This is B4 mobile phones, computers and emailing all came along BTW. Back then when you sent your team in you had to send a note by carrier pigeon. Which was a bit hit and miss you understand.... They used pigeon's in the war for carrying messages, its true, back then pigeons had Germans to contend with, anti aircraft fire, friendly fire and cats!. Nowadays we still have Germans but they just make nice cars and beat us at football and cats. No we HAVE cats. Germans don't beat cats, least I don't think so So imagine how annoying it is to send your team instructions over via carrier pigeon for an important cup match THEN TO LOSE, all because some Kraut in an Audi ran the blighter over. Vorsprung durch Technik my ass Well we wish Rosemary all the best in her future endeavour's. Anyway that's old news so our scout Richard Tynan was volunteered to man the phones until the girl from the agency gets here. Next Up: Who remember's "Mrs Badcrumble" from last weeks slot?. I've had a lot of you txt me, ring me, write me and mostly BUG me about the little old lady from Hullavington Terrace, apparently you thought she were "GERT MINT even a breath of fresh air" some of you were even left speechless. So back by popular demand I've dragged her into the office to give her account on last week's game. MRS Badcrumble welcome to Oceans7. "Thank you, thank you ill get straight in to it. Its very simple you see. A detrimental if not important factor to remember when playing this game of yours is GRAVITY" GRAVITY. "YES gravity please don't interrupt, now The fundamental force of attraction that all objects with mass have for each other. Like the electromagnetic force, gravity has effectively infinite range and obeys the inverse-square law. At the atomic level, where masses are very small, the force of gravity is negligible, but for objects that have very large masses such as planets, stars, and galaxies, gravity is a predominant force, and it plays an important role in theories of the structure of the universe. Gravity is believed to be mediated by the graviton, although the graviton has yet to be isolated by experiment. Gravity is weaker than the strong force, the electromagnetic force, and the weak force. Also called gravitation." GOOD good well thank you for coming in Mrs Badcrumble, I think we could give you a job over in Tactical analysis actually. To Chris if you read this load of old Tosh, if I send you a team in one week with a tactic of "scientific"?? then you know..... "With his law of universal gravitation, Sir Isaac Newton described gravity as the mutual attraction between any two bodies in the universe. He developed an equation describing an etc etc " (puts ipod earphones in.......)
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Post by Raven on Jun 2, 2016 6:25:10 GMT
To put it briefly, all balls will eventually drop. Even Vipers.
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Post by Oceans Seven on Jun 7, 2019 18:04:53 GMT
So ummm its been a while, 2 years and change ish. One finger typing away here. Last season went well Oceans 7 got just two cups but hey two is good. We got the "fairplay award" - again!. Think we won that back in season 1 aswell. Apparently we play well with others.... not quite what we had in mind, maybe too many visit's to the cage could have resulted in a detrimental psychological effect on the team's mental health. But anyway we got some fresh talent on the team this season so the glove's are back off so watch out you lot. Yeah NUUHHhhhh there that's nice and fierce!. HA. So some of our fan's are wondering what the new Ocean's logo is all about, if you had been with us from the start you would know... honestly. Right quick history lesson then. A long time ago in a galaxy far far far away, (just imagine this all scrolling up quicker then you can read it ok) far far away in a sleepy suburb of some town in Bristol. A cool dude with jedi powers decided to put together a fastball team. So as there were so many foreign chaps to chose from living in Bristol oddly a lot of Japanies lads as well THEY also thought it would be a good idea to play a sport and get fit. I just jedi mind tricked them really and stole there passports. So I own there ass The name Oceans 7 was my idea and after a unanimous vote (mine) that became the team's name . Next we needed some place to practice, play game's and train etc "a place we could call our own. But cash always being in short supply that and the jedi mind trick "suggestion by manipulation " was exhausting. I decided a phone call to a friend was in order. Said friend worked for the National Trust and said we could train and play at Blaze Castle which is a light saber's throw just north of Bristol its just out there by Westbury, the posh bit. As long as we cut the grass for them from time to time. So that explain's the castle in the logo dosent it? yes it does!. The Lion is for "s t r e n g t h?" umm strength, the Lion is, means strength yes of coarse that's what that stand's for. The Crow?.......sh*t I dunno O wait its like the tower of London the crows are for luck see when ever we play away we always do well.....right? so its all about going back to your root's and not forgetting where you came from etc etc O that reminds me "Going back to my root's by Odessey" if you listen to that old motown track carefully and think about it. Its what pigeon's listen to when they walk around. See I like to leave you as I found you......... disturbed but slightly changed after reading our blog...thing, here. END INTERVIEW........
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Post by Raven on Jun 7, 2019 18:11:37 GMT
Sometimes I wonder if you just make this stuff up..........
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Post by Oceans Seven on Jun 7, 2019 18:32:52 GMT
You think??
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